First, let me get this out of the way.  I’d love for you to buy a t-shirt.

Ok, there we go, on with the shards!

1. I think I drank an unhealthy amount of water yesterday, because I’m feeling like I’m swimming.  I bought a bottle of SmartWater (Glaceau) yesterday to try it, and the bottle itself is 33.8 oz, 1 liter, or 1 quart.  Pick a measurement.  Anyway, so, it’s a clear bottle, and the way the label is printed, there are (not so) hidden messages on the inside of the label.  On talks about vapor distilling being teh aw3some, and the other has a goldfish…and I wanted to uncover the goldfish.  I didn’t hit my goal, because, by the time I got home, I wanted to unwind and have a beer . My 1/4th of a bottle of SmartWater is still sitting here, waiting for me to uncover the goldfish….and I’ve peed, like, 20 times tonight.  I’m thinkin’ I need a water break   (I know you didn’t want to know that.  This is my “Not Care” face )

2. Something’s wrong with my microphone.  I found this out the other day when I went to start podcasting (one of my goals for the year, and December’s next month).  Oh, well.  I’ll just keep blogging!  Bastard microphone, anyway

3. What is it with taking offense to stupid shit like “Ho, Ho, Ho”?  Seriously?!?!?!?  I counter that attack with my own offense taking.  I’m offended by people who are easily offended.  I even made that a t-shirt last night (and I expect y’all to spread the word that I made it.  Neener).  I plan to buy at least 12, wear them every day, and pass them out to people on the street.
Ok, so I’ll buy one and wear it.

4. Brodie is feeling more regular now that he’s on his medicine.  Good stuff!    He’s had his good days and his bad days, but, well, every kid has ‘em.

5. I’m on a t.v. fast.  More of a strike.  I’ve stopped giving television (and by television, I currently mean Comcast) my money to not pay Writers.  Yes, this is honestly me supporting the strike.  I’ve stopped watching streaming video that isn’t amateur YouTube nonsense.  Why?  Because, writers are VASTLY underpaid unless their stuff is marketed well.  And, yes, I mean marketed.  9 out of 10 times, what you’re watching on t.v. isn’t there because the writing is teh aw3some (yeah, already used it, it’s 4:30am).  It’s because it was sold well.  It was packaged well.  The joke about writers ‘daylighting’ by being waitstaff is NOT an exaggeration.  So, I’ve stopped consuming advertisement fed via t.v. and internet.  I have also stopped reading the news, but that’s for a different reason.

6. As much as I’ve actually tried not to care, I’m sick of being assaulted with Britney Spears.  Can we just let her kill her career and be done with it?  I don’t really care how much money she has, unless she starts giving some to me.  And by some, I mean tens of thousands.
Matter of fact, I don’t want to hear about ANY of the stupid pop tarts.
What does this mean?  It means I don’t get to watch CSI, Mythbusters, How It’s Made, and Brodie doesn’t get to watch….Hip Hop Harry.  It’s all good, because we’ve got movies, books, and the internet.

7. Speaking of books…I need to make time to read.  I haven’t read anything since AUGUST.  That’s a looooooooooooong time.  /nod.

I’m done   That was it.

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They need to have “lists” in the category section for blogs /nod.
– -  People keep telling me that I’d absolutely love  by Ani DiFranco.   I can’t stand Ani DiFranco.   Just because I like female vocalists AND folk music, and sometimes play it, doesn’t mean I like Ani DiFranco.  It’s like saying that, because I’ve got blonde hair, I should love the beach.  IMHO, she’s everything that’s wrong with female musicians from the 90’s.

– – The Acquirement of previously mentioned piano has been put on hold, as I’m waiting to actually re-arrange my living room.  And, I need another couch before I do that.

– – I <3 peanut butter brownie ice cream.

– – Now that I’m working in an office environment, my glasses no longer need weekly adjustmentation.  And, yes, I just made that word up.  Deal.

– – When I finally “got” that it was time to leave Matt, I was listening to “Don’t Get Your Back Up” by Sarah Harmer.  If you haven’t heard it, you should.

It’s late now
And there’s only four hours ’til I get up again
You know I’d wait somehow
If I thought this was something
That a little time would mend
You, you’re dragging this misery on
Let’s leave this thing for a while
It’s too far gone
Too far gone

Don’t get your back up over this
If I’m so wrong and you’re so right
You really got your mind made up I guess
Won’t you let me get some sleep
Won’t you let me get some sleep
Won’t you let me get some sleep tonight
So, yeah, 2nd verse and chorus, and the song is awesome.  Sometimes, leaving isn’t just the right decision.  It’s the only one.

 

– – I’m slowly getting my confidence back.  While shopping at Bath and Body works this week, I sang along, out loud, to the music, not caring if anyone heard me.  I haven’t done that in years.  So, maybe I’ll be able to give myself another chance at singing at church, sans podium

– – Brodie’s doing great in school.  He’s at the top of his class, and way more chill this year than last.  He was sick this past Wednesday, though.  Poor guy.

– – I’ve gained 5 lbs since I’ve started my new job at Merillat.  That’s a problem.  I need to not gain weight.  So, next month, I’m going to start working out at the CFC, because it’s cheaper than the YMCA.    Plus, there’s a bowling alley there, and I think Brodie would love bowling.

– – Water bottles are horrible for the environment.  I know this.  But, I also know that they were keeping my diet on track.    I would drink about 5 per day (yeah, probably an unhealthy amount of water), and not eat as much because there was no room, but what I WOULD eat would be healthy and good.  Water; Nature’s diet pill.

– – Because I know Christy is going to tease me about it…last night, I had a date.  And, no, you’re not going to hear about it.    Suffice it to say, original plans were botched, Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy was watched, and pizza was had.  And he was gone by 11pm.  See, I’m still pure!

– – I’ve recently been used as a mouthpiece.  The offending party has been forgiven, but, because he needs to be humilated (and because he reads this blog), I’m going to post this here, because, well, like he said, I’m blunt. 
Now, normally, I don’t get into someone else’s “fight” voluntarily.  And this was no different.  I had a friend invite me to lunch a while back, and he brought his brother.  Before we sat down, said friend “warned me” that I my snarkiness may be needed.    So, we sat, and ordered.
Now, I don’t know if my friends brother was born a freaking moron, or what, but, he was swinging from the shattered remains of what was my last nerve within the first 5 minutes.  And I told him so, repeatedly.  Asking such wonderful questions as “So, yeah, how often do you eat lead-based paintchips?” or “Do you run into the wall headfirst, for fun?”.  Along with the classic “How can you possibly be this stupid?”  It is for occasions like this when I want to bring along that head juicer thing Zaphod wore in HHGTTG when he lost his second head to Humma Kavula.

I dropped Brodie off at school 2 hours ago.  I came home, made some Kool-Aid, and did a little bit, not a lot, of cleaning.

It’s weird.  I woke him up early, and we had an early-morning talk about how the day was going to go, how excited he was to go back to school, and that he’s got to act appropriate.  (Meaning, no fit throwing, no telling Mrs. Isley that he’s in charge, none of it.)  So, we got up, he had breakfast (puffed brown rice with Nestle Quick on it instead of sugar.  It’s got a slight amount of nutrition in it.), we watched Transformers Cybertron on Cartoon Network, we got dressed, brushed our teeth, said a little prayer, and got into the truck, and headed off to school.  (Yay, run-on sentences!!)  We got in the truck just in time for Brodie to see the local bus go by (we’re in the Adrian school district, and I take him to Sand Creek, because, well, it’s better.  Neener.), and we had a big talk all the way there about how I’m his bus ride to school, but he takes the bus to Rachel’s house after school, and I’ll pick him up after work.

We get to school, I look to see if there’s any other paperwork I need to fill out, and he sees his little friend, Katie, and they talk, and goof off.  I see all of the teachers he had the year before, and meeting with his aide.  Then, his other friend, Kaitlin, walked in, they shared a hug, and talked for a few minutes.  Finally, we walked down to his class.  I have got to say, I am SO much happier leaving him in Mrs. Isley’s capable hands than I was last year with Mrs. Reist.  I am at ease.

And, also, I’m lonely.  It will go away on Thursday when I start my new job, but, still.  I miss watching dumb cartoons.  I miss playing silly games.  I miss playing Battleship.  (which does not count as a silly game.  It’s a preparer for learning Risk.  Don’t even give me that look.)  I miss reading with him.  I miss walking to the library.  I miss going for walks at the Christian Family Center, which is right down the street.

I miss him.  *sigh*.  And I go get to pick him up in 1 hour

It’s a sad thing, to end a book that you don’t want to put down. It’s worse when there’s a whole series of them, and they finally end, in the way you thought was perfect….but they’re still over.

I read The Bone Doll’s Twin, and reviewed it a while back, so I won’t go into it here. Then, I read Hidden Warrior, and forgot to review it, so I’ll have to read it again and do so.

So, the county library didn’t have The Oracle’s Queen. So, I went to Walden Books and bought it, because I HAD TO read it. This book kept me up until all hours of the night. I just couldn’t put it down!

Ok, it sounds a little far-fetched and weird. There are gender issues going on in these books. There’s also “Evil for the sake of Good” issues. However, they aren’t sugar-coated, and they aren’t made to be something else.

What I love about Lynn Flewelling’s writing is how real her characters are. You want to join them in battle, you want to cheer for their victories, you want to give them a hug when they’re troubled…it’s just great writing.
And, I mentioned this before, I LOVE how, as a fantasy writer, she broaches the subject of sex. See, I read a lot of sci-fi and fantasy novels. Most of them are porn with a fantasy/sci-fi wrapper. You read things about throbbing manhoods, heaving bosoms, warm wetness, and other euphamisms for penis, vagnia, and breasts. Because, you know, we can’t have too many words for those things.
She writes it as what it is. Sex as a subject, between two people, especially two young people, is akward, embarrassing, and weird. And she writes that whole thought process perfectly. It gets weirder if you really love the person. And, not like I’ve had it happen to me, but apparently it’s WAY weirder if one of the two of you, who used to share in brotherly love (not sex), was burned by the fire of the Gods and had the “shell” of her male body burnt off her and became a girl. See, I write it, and it seems absolutely weird. Lynn Flewelling writes it? Pure genius. Absolutely.
I recommend her books highly. Even if you’re not into fantasy books.

————————————————————–

Now, for the life stuff.
First, I’m in full-on stress-out mode. I don’t know if my wallet was stolen or I lost it, but it’s been missing since Thursday. I’m on full-out stress mode. So, if you call me, and I’m jittering like a methhead, you know why.

Second, I’ve been talked into learning the piano for a project. After a friend visited my house the other night, listening to me sing along to the “Guns ‘N Roses” radio on Rhapsody, she, and her boyfriend, convinced me that I need to learn how to play their songs on the piano and sing them. I mean, if you think about it, it’s not so far-fetched. I mean, Axl played piano. However, if I want to record it, the problem is getting the rights to do so. And, well, I’m broke.

And, finally, in good news, I have a new job, starting Tuesday. I will be working at Merillat here in Adrian. They manufacture kitchen cabinetry, and I’ll get to be a geek all day long.

And, that’s everything for today

Ok, we get it.  Britney Spears is the worst parent evah.  And the worst parent that ever will be.  She’s a demoness who has rained down misfortune on the two adorable children that have been cursed with the parents that they have.  She hates her children, keeps them up at all hours of the night, and feeds them horrible things, like pop, candy, and junk food.
And I don’t know AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANY parents in my whole network of People I’ve Ever Met– like that.  I, the woman who, with regrets, gave her son a dose of Tylenol when he wasn’t sick so she could sleep and get up and work 3rd shift.  I’ve seen more “child abuse” in 15 minutes watching people at Wal-Mart than Britney Spears has “committed” in the whole 3 or so years hers have been born.  And most of them are not only able to keep their kids, but they’re in the damn system, being checked on every few months or so by a not-so-highly-trained social worker.
So, you know, no, she’s not a saint.  No, she’s not the ideal mother.  Guess what?  We’re a generation of kids who were raised by parents who were less than ideal, and we’re now raising a bunch of spoiled brats.  And, it seems, with every generation, we get more and more “don’t punish the kid!” and get bigger assholes of children.  Prisons fill up, the streets fill with asshole children, and everyone wonders where we went wrong.

For those you with children, pregnant, or planning to have children, DISCIPLINE THEM WHEN THEY DO SOMETHING WRONG.  For those of you without and never wanting them, realize this; even if you don’t want to be a role model, you are.  It’s a shitty part of life.
Most of all, though, Parents, please raise your children to know that they have a brain.  Don’t treat them like idiots, because, their VCR and DVD-player programming brains have figured out before they’re 10 that you’re a complete moron, and that the only reason that they can’t just go over your head and raise themselves is that jobs suck, or you wouldn’t be in such a bad mood when you get home from yours.  Love your kids, be with your kids, read with your kids, and turn off the damn t.v., X-Box, Computer, or whatever it is that’s distracting you from being with your children.  This is, BTW, and open letter to everyone who’ll read it.
Why?
I’m sick and tired of the news wasting time in magazines and newspapers, in news reports, and in the news online, to report to me about Britney Spears’ latest fuckup.  Because we’re all not big enough losers to think it sucks when it happens to us, we have to gloat about being better parents (and better dressed) than her.  It’s like going to the Special Olympics and making fun of the 2nd place runner for losing.  In the end, you’re a bigger retard.